It's 12/14/12 and I'm sad.
Not depressed as has become the trendy thing to be marked by an attempt to feel better via pharmaceuticals.
I have been sad o'er the whole Holiday thing because I would love to bring about cheer and love and ... but I find myself 'bout as broke as I've ever been, however there is "light at the end of the tunnel."
But right now I'm writing this and listening to the media coverage of the school shootings in Connecticut.
I want to cry but I can't. I don't know if I'm holding back or what.
I can't understand this whole shooting thing.
It seems as if it is becoming way too often a news item broken up by commercials.
I had a min i panic moment when I heard about the mall shootings in Portland because that's where my brother and his wife live.
Life is precious.
I'm still reeling from being a cancer patient even though I consider myself a cancer survivor.
I trust my Doctors and am glad that I am in a state of forced remission.
My stint in 2010 laying in the University of Colorado Hospital in Denver didn't really "hit" me until some time had passed and I was told that I spent all those months in the hospital because I was really, really sick although I didn't really realize it at the time.
Life is precious and I can';t understand why things like this happen with a 20 or 21 year old kid killing his mother and then going to the school where she worked and killed 26 people or however many there were that died.
I want to do something to make things in Connecticut but all I can do is pray.
God, as I understand Him, is hurting to an extent that I cannot understand. These are His kids who died.
I want to ask Him why but the "whys" don't matter.
Some of us at the First Church of the Second Chance are studying When Bad things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner. I kinda get what Mr. Kushner is saying but the something like this happens.
I don't want bad things to happen to good people.
I don't.
Father God, please let Your Holy Spirit act in a mighty way comforting those who have lost loved ones in this tragedy. Please.
Please Father...act mightily.
Please.
