Expiration dates...

Do you pay any attention to expiration dates?
I do and I don't.
I don't when I'm just "general" grocery shopping, but I always go to the markdown bin to see if there are any super deals and mostly the super deals are items that have past their expiration date and so if something catches my eye I'll check the expiration date...just because and chances are 99 out of a 100 that if it's somethin' I need or can use I'll buy it.
Then there's the "used meat department" which is TIPPETTSPEAK for the meat markdown bin. I even know which store has the deepest markdowns and I go there once or twice a week  mid morning to check out the "deals."

Wellst, I've had a different kind of expiration date experience...

You see, even though I now consider myself a cancer survivor I still have Multiple Myeloma and always will. They cannot eradicate all the Multiple Myeloma cells in my bone marrow because in order to do that they would have to kill off all my bone marrow and that wouldn't bode well for me living.
So, the plan is...subject to change as has taken place throughout this adventure which started 3/17/10 when I was diagnosed...that I be on this chemo drug Revlimid for the next 2.8 years and I'm assuming they'll have some new treatment regimen for me tho keep the cancer at bay.
When first diagnosed they were considering a bone marrow transplant and that would give me "up to 5 years".
Then they decided that I qualified for a Stem Cell Transplant and they could give me from 5 to 10 years...I'll take it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last Monday I went down to the University of Colorado Hospital for my monthly check up, was able to see my main Oncologist Dr. Lee and after going over my blood test results for the past bunch of months, and my response to the treatment plans he had prescribed for my, mostly administered by Dr. McFarland up here, that he could safely give me 10 to 20 years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My expiration date has just been extended!!!!!

That's the good news.
The bad news is two fold.
First, I'm gonna have a recurrence of Myeloma, but "not to worry" because that's why they harvested and then froze extra stem cells when I had my transfusion so that I did have a "relapse" I wouldn't have to go through the gruelingnesss of another harvest.
Second, the chances are if I don't watch out and keep myself fit, away from people who are not well...he didn't specify mental or physical or both..., and keep myself warm not inviting a cold that as someone with a history of pneumonia I'm prone to contracting and a cold can rapidly turn into pneumonia and that is what probably will kill me.
So hence, my expiration date has been extended with conditions.

He gave me a flu shot and sent me on my merry way saying, "See you in a month."

Next post I'll get into the Revlimid story...

Who'da thunk???

Wellst, I've been 63 for over a week now and I don't feel any different than I did the last week of bein' 62...but I feel a whole lot better than I did for a lot of the time I was 62 and even some of bein' 61!

You know, I think it was on my last post that I used the term, "cancer survivor".
That rocked me.
I remember back in March of 2010 when I was diagnosed and I just knew I was gonna die and I was gonna die a relatively slow, agonizingly painful and ugly death. I mean, if you have cancer that's how you "hop the twig" as an ol' English gal friend of mine used to call "kickin' the bucket." afore she "hopped the twig", right? That's how both my folks went and so that was my experience.
So, now I know different and I have a new experience.

And my new experience is that I am a cancer survivor. I still have Multiple Myeloma and I always will...maybe. Who knows what they'll come up with in the next few years.
Right now I'm officially in what they call "forced remission."
They can't go in and kill off all the Multiple Myeloma cells because in order to do that they'd have to kill all my bone marrow which would not bode well for surviving that procedure, so I'm in the beginning of a three year chemo regimen designed to keep the Multiple Myeloma cells in check. I get my blood checked once a week to make sure that's what's happening, although the past few months was a bit of an anomaly in that I went several months without any chemo as my platelet count had tanked and they couldn't/wouldn't give me chemo until my platelet level climbed significantly. You run around with a platelet count of about 140 something-or-other and mine at one time skidded to 17! When I climbed over 100 they felt that was appropriate to begin the chemo again.
I don't go in for a chemo drip but rather take a pill at home...22 days on and then 8 days off with a batch of steroids every Monday.
These pills, Revlimid retail for, guess what?
$7,345 for my 22 day supply!
Thank goodness for insurance and thank goodness for Obama Care! I don't give a rats derriere what anyone thinks of him or his health care plan, all I know is that as of July 2010, insurance companies are no longer allowed to drop anyone's coverage for anything other than non payment of premiums. Last I added them up, and it's been a while, my medical bills were well over a million dollars and there's no doubt in my mind or the Doc's minds that they would have booted me long before they had to pay out anything close to what they have paid and I would have "hopped the twig" and I darest not think ow what that might have looked like.
So, I'm a very happy 63 year old cancer survivor, and I think I'll stay that way if it's okay with you!

Hi there...
I know I "broke my word" about being more consistent about blogging and I'm not gonna make any promises about gettin' with it in the future cuz that's kinda like a New Year's Resolution,,,i.e. it's meant to be broken.
I do this not so much for you, but for my journal and for my autobiography, "I Don't Do Rough Drafts" which is really written...or bein' written for my son so at some point he can read it if he so desires...for my son so he can know who his dad really is/was. I've only been workin' on that for 10 years and I think I'm up to the 1st Grade living in Red Feather.

Nuff 'bout that...

I had every intention of hittin' the computer and doing this last night because yesterday was maybe one of the best days I've ever had in my whole life!
Yes, it was my birthday...63, thank you...but I got to spend it hangin' with a bunch of my drunk buddies, 'bout 1200 of them at the Area 10 State Convention...the social event of the year, if you will for Alcoholics Anonymous in the State of Colorado.
You know, I've been MIA from a lot of stuff for 'bout a year an a half and not only was it good to see folks I haven't seen in a while, but to receive both Birthday wishes and congratulation on being a cancer survivor and a lot of the people making comments about either event I didn't even recognize! If it weren't for the name badges I would have embarrassed my self a half a dozen times or more.
The feeling I had inside was reminiscent of the feeling that I had at the Bowlathon that the Board of Realtors had for me.
There's an overwhelming feeling that I get that tries to tell me I'm not worthy of the love and affection that I get  and simultaneously I have this feeling of "schadenfreud". That's a word I came across while reading "When Bad Things Happen To Good People"...it's that almost guilty feeling that you get when something bad happens to someone else and you think that maybe it should happen to you...like dying.
Since my diagnosis on 3/17/10 there have been a number of people who have succumbed to cancer or another malady...and then there was Justin who we buried on his 29th birthday just a couple of weeks ago...63 year old guys with cancer should die, not 28 year old young men who die of an acute asthma attack.
Change of attitude...
I got to hear a couple of dear friends speak, Lew and Judy from Boulder. Both of them have significant, quality time in A.A.and I learn something from them every time I spend any time with them.
Not to take anything away from Lew and Judy, but one of the speakers, who turned n80 the day before I turned 63 spoke twice on a subject near and dear to m heart, God as I understand him. His name is Sandy Beach...yes that is his real name...and he lives in Tampa Bay, FL.
Both he and Judy made me cry, but I think I hid it well...I think.
I cried! I'm alive! I feel!
There was also an excitement over Matt coming up tomorrow, which is now today, and bring Ari, my 4 year old grandson with him.

I had every intention of coming home last night and doing this...

Even though I've just been back on chemo for just a couple of weeks, I'v had "parchment" skin for quite a while.Parchment skin is a nomer for skin that is thin and dry and it ears easily, especially where I have bruises that look like dark age spots caused by having a low platelet level.
Anywho, I got home about 11:00 and went to get something to drink out of th fridge and went into my home office and turned the computer on. While it was doing its get turned on thing I went back into the kitchen and noticed a blood trail on the floor.
That's not unusual ceptin' it, the tear, usually happens to my left arm or hand where I have no feeling. This one was on the back of my right hand and I have/had no idea on how I did it.
Now, it's almost midnight and I'm bleeding like the proverbial stuck pig.
Usually a little direct pressure will stop the bleeding and I slap a Band Aid on and it and I'm good to go.
Well, for some reason I could not get this one to stop bleeding. Now, mind you, this is on my right hand and because I can't get it to stop bleeding I can't get undressed, I can't brush my teeth and  I can't get my two lanyards off (my name badge from the convention and my glasses). I can however get a rag and clean up the blood on the floor and the counter in the kitchen.
I get it to slow down and I get some NuSkin and figure out how to apply some and,"OUCH!!!!!". It felt like I was using a Styptic pencil...anybody ever use one of those?
That didn't work so we got another paper towel and back to direct pressure.
Twas shortly after 1:00 that I got it to almost stop, at least enough to get not one, not two, not three but four Band Aids on it.
I woke up this morning to find that I had mildly bled through all 4 Band Aids, so I removed them and bled politely through my shower and then it was back to direct pressure and it didn't take all that long to get the  bleeding stopped.I put on some NuSkin, but no "ouch" this time, and two Band Aids and that has lasted all day.
Wellst, now I have cramping in my left hand so I'm gonna sign off.
Know that I have a love for life and for you.

Sadness, but a reminder...

My young friends funeral service was held yesterday at the Evangelical Covenant Church here in Fort Collins.Today he was buried in Flagler, CO...a small community out east in the plains, a community sooooo small there isn't even a stop light. There is where the family plot is and now that's where he is.
Fridays @ 5:30pm we have an AA meeting at my friend Jack's house.
Jack has quite a story in that he had a liver transplant back in '96 I think and in '98 he contracted West Nile. Twixt the transplant and the West Nile, where he was in a coma for several months, he has a taste of "almost dying" a couple of times.
During my Cancer journey, the DNR got pulled out twice. I only barely remember one of those instances but in the past few days I've had cause to reflect back and ponder those two times.
I really put some people who were/are pretty close to me through a living hell. One of them, who has my Medical Power of Attorney calls my "episode" in Poudre Valley Hospital as the worst week of his life.
Anywho, back to Jack...I got to his house a little early and we got to talk one-on-one for a while and mutually reflect on how he and I have  deep appreciation for life...not just ours, but the lives of others, too.
Sadly, too many people just take life for granted...that doesn't make them all bad, it's just that they have not had any personal near death experiences or been close to someone who has either had a near death experience or who has died.
Life is precious, not only mine but yours, too.
Coming up on Aug. 25th is the 1 year anniversary of my Stem Cell Transplant and one of those people closest too me, my Friend Doug is having a party to celebrate that occasion and is inviting "Team Pete" and some others who played a loving roll in basically keeping me alive.
I'm thinking it'll almost be like a "wake"!
If you are reading this, I will know that you will be there in Spirit and I sooooooo appreciate and love you for your participation in my life.
Thank you.

Soooooooooooo...

...I got way from blogging...again.
Dang.
Anywho, It's been a wile and my brother guilt tripped me this afternoon into blogging again....thanks, Kevin!
So, I've been out for a coupla+ weeks now and it feels wonderful, although I'm not feeling wonderful at the moment.
More 'bout that later.

My hair has grown back slowly, but It's been probably close to three months ago I had a hairct and I'm not quite ready for another one yet.
I weighed in this morning at 164.5 and I haven't done the subtraction, but I was 238 when I checked into the Universty of Colorado Hospital last year.

I'm real close to going to the Miramont health Club and taking advantage of the membership that my insurance company will pay for.
I really got to enjoy the Physical and Occupational Therapy when I was in the rehab and I really have no excuse for not going and exercising that free membership. I'm hoping I can find a trainer who will work with me much like the therapists in rehab did.
I went to the Salws Meeting at RE/MAX te other day and really enjoyed it. I'm really trying to take it easy and gradually eas back into te "workplace".
I really need to build up my stamina and energy (Hence the Health Club?!?) because I really don't want to find myself back in the hospital.

I would "blog on", but like I said, I'm not really feeling wondeful right now.

It's no secret that I'm a card carrying member of Alcoholics Anonymous, and an active member at that. One of the things we do in AA is "sponsor" people, that is mentor them and take them through the 12 Steps.
About 3 months ago, a new guy walked into my Home Group, the But For The Grace group, and as the Universe would have it he was a member of the Health Community and was actually a Medical Assistant at one of the clinics that I go to.
He was having a difficult time staying sober, but was making great spiritual progress at the same time. We were meeting a couple of times a week other than going to a few meetings together and he took a hankerin' to both the First Church of the Second Chance and the Evangelical Covenant Church.
He was 28 years old.
Was?
He died yesterday.
Last Wednesday the Dark Side grabbed him and wouldn't let go and he drank.
It was obvious that he had been drinking when I went to pick him up for the FCSC (First Church of the Second Chance) but we went anyway and afterwards came to the mutual conclusion that he should go over to Greeley and spend a few days with his mother to detox and sober up.
She came over and picked him up, but he was able to conceal that he had been drinking from her.
I did not know that Thursday she was going down to Parker for a few days.
He and I exchanged phone calls and text messages and, in spite of he DT's and hallucinations he seemed to be doing well.
Last night I got a call from his mother telling me that he had died.
We talked at length and I went over to Greeley this mornng. His two aunts, his mother's and her male friend from Parker were there.
Long story short...the autopsy performed this morning was inconclusive. The Coroner sent away what he had to send away for toxicology reports. He said that from what he could tell there had been no foul play and there was, to bthe best of his knowledge no drugs or alcohol in his system.
His mother lives across the street from an elementary school and neighbors said that mid-afternoon Saturday they had seen him over at the school saluting an empty flagpole, but then lost sight of him.
About an hour later someone ran across his body in the schoolyard and called the police who then tracked down his mother and called her in Parker.
There are a couple of more odd details, but they aren't pertinent to this blog.

Thanks for listening and I need to go try and get some sleep.
I didn't get much last night and in the morning I need to make some rounds telling some people and institutions of his passing rather than have his mother come over and do that which would be at best an unplesant task for her.

Allelujiah!!!!!!

...or however you spell it.

Today is one of the happiest days of my life.

My Multiple Myeloma is in "forced remission" which is the absolute best state of being that a Myeloma Cancer patient can be in.
After many, many tests of all kinds, the cause of the chronic blood infection I had which was throwing me alternately into tremors trying to get warm to night sweats because I was too hot and trying to stuff me in the Tuff Shed at the same time...and this had been going on since November last!...was found and taken care of.
The C-diff intestinal bacterial issues have been made to dissappear.
AND Today the last of my Dr.s up here (I've got one more to consult in Denver) has declared me pert ne'er as healthy as I'll ever get because the mass in my lung which just few months ago they biopsied to see if it was cancerous (it warn't) had just disappered completely and gave me the "green light", as has all my other Docs, to continue with re-hab for a bit and then ease myself back "into the mainstreet of life", as my friend Vicky would say.

Tonight, looking back what most vividly comes to mind is that, "prayer works."

Thanks for all your prayers...

I feel like I should be the target/subject of a Marty Robbins Country Western Ballad...

Huh?

Well, seems it's been since June 10th past that I have posted...I promised to do better.

Perhaps it's been that a lot has happened since then?

Lemme tell you, we're fighting this "ill-health" stuff with everything I have and a lot I don't have, and in the not too distant future I will be as re-healthy as I can be and both back at my vocation and avocation with all the enthusiasm and passion I can muster.

This I promise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now we're gonna talk about the past 6 weeks...the names have been changed to protect the innocent, the guilty, the selfish, the altruistic, the ignorant, the sheep, the undeclared motivationists and everybody else involved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~Let me disclaim the "facts as I see them are as I see them and possibly suspect~~~

Okay, post June 10th posting I have found my self back in the hospital and rehab twice :-(.

Once because of the results of the sudden onslaught of a high fever, 104 degree fever that brought on not shivers but uncontrollable tremors that could not, would not stop.

And again because of  high fever, sans tremors.

My Docs have been really puzzled over the blood infections that causes sooooo many of my health woes, and after intraconsultation decided to remove both my Super Port and my Three Lumen Hickman (the devices through which for the past year+ I have been receiving chemo, having blood drawn, transfusions of both blood and platelets, re hydration fluids, magnesium, potassium and who knows what else...oh, yeah, stem cells in and out.) feeling that perhaps they were the source of infection.
Wellst, they removed them both, set me up with an IV and, "poof", the infection is gone and the conclusion is that it was the ports that had been causing the blood infection problems all the way back to my stays in the University of Colorado Hospital in Denver.

So anywho, during time of these procedures and discoveries, I wake up to a posse {Now begins the Monty Robbins Ballad in a non-musical genre} surrounding my bed!
I'm a little groggy, but this is what I hear, see and feel...

• I'm told that I have roughly 20 days to spend down whatever funds I have and to sell off any assets to $2,000 or less because this is what will be needed for me to be Medicaid eligible.
• Once I am Medicaid eligible I can be moved to an Assisted living Care facility of some sort and my Social Security Disability and Medicare and Medicaid will be intercepted to pay my bills at the Assisted Living Center and I will be allocated $100.00 per month.
• And lucky me, this arrangement would go on for the rest of my life, "Thank you!".

~~~Again,let me disclaim that the "facts as I see them are as I see them and possibly suspect ~~~

Needless to say I'm a little shell shocked and attempt to mount a defense, even though it's 8 to 1, but I get shot down when the posse calls for a vote and the posse created question goes out to the posse, "Do you think pete can live by himself?"

Well, the vote was 8-0...surprise, surprise, surprise.

Then there were some cordial adieus, and they saddled up and rode off into the sunrise.

"I feel the bullet go deep in my chest..."

Funny how things work sometimes...

Within a few moments one of my Docs came in for morning rounds and I tell him of the saga of being encaptured, arrested, tried, convicted and sentenced.

With some emotion I might add, he pondered, "I wonder how they came to this conclusion without talking to your doctor?"
He told me to take it easy, my blood pressure needn't any more stressors and to get a hold of someone from the hospital patient advocacy department, which I did.
The advocate came up and reiterated that I had nothing to worry and no one could take my rights away and I could/should keep him informed.

Later that day my Neurologist PA came in with the results of Cat Scans, X-rays and MRIs and told me as far as he was concerned I was free to go home after rehab.

The next morning another of my Docs was making rounds an told me that the plan all along had been for me to finish rehab and go home and back to work.

Soooooooooooo, here's the plan.
I'm gonna finish out my time at here at rehab, because I want to, not because I have to and then I'm gonna go home and continue rehab and slowly prepare to and slowly re-enter the work world.
And this is with the blessings of my physicians and therapists.

What I am not going to do is to be herded into a 12x12 enclosure with $2,000 in assets and a $100.00 a month allowance for the rest of my life and the opportunity to play Bingo once a week, have someone read the newspaper to me in group, listen to a weekly piano player relive Liberace and an opportunity to go to Walmart once a month to spend what allowance monies I have left after hitting the vending machine all month.

Nope, that's not the plan.

More will be revealed, I'm sure.

If any of the posse reads this and takes offense....I'm sorry.
I know you were/are just trying to be of help and I do appreciate it, and I appreciate all you've done for me up to this point.
I've lost one friend over all this and I would hate to loose another.
Good Friends are hard to find and bond with.